Police Academy toys.

I just found this little ad floating around in an old VHS today. I had no idea these existed, and I was the EXACT TARGET MARKET. Great job Kenner, you lost out on the only sales you could've had for this line of toys.

Here's the entire ad:

Let's look a little closer, shall we?

Some regular characters (House, Motormouth Jones) and a made up villain. Marching on...

Looks like we got another made up (and racist) villain, Tackleberry, Mahoney and - HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE!

It's Stakeout Sweetchuck!! 

Also in the set is Zed, possibly the only toys modeled (poorly) on Bobcat Goldthwait. Isn't it enough that his boxers have little hearts? Did they have to make his shorts polka dotted, too?

Here's something my brothers and I could've used:

And all the rest of the shit: